We've all heard it and most of us have said it at some point, that ubiquitous statement of exception, "I would've, BUT I couldn't/wouldn't/shouldn't...".
After decades of hearing excuses and making a few of my own there are no "but's" about it, it's easier to place the blame somewhere else than to take responsibility for our own shortcomings.
Self-regulatory strength is like a muscle, if we don't exercise our self-control we can't strengthen it. It's really easy to cut ourselves some slack, and then a little more, and yet more. Before we know it, we've eaten the whole pie instead of just a slice and who are we to blame? How do we break that cycle? We break it by getting off our "But's".
- Determine what is important to you. It can be family, health, faith or something else. Whatever it is that's important to you, write it down.
- What do you hope to accomplish? Is it a family vacation? Losing a few pounds? Stopping smoking? Finding purpose? Whatever accomplishments you hope to achieve, write them down.
- What tasks are required to reach my goal? Do you need to save money to go on vacation? Could you get up an hour earlier to get in a workout? Perhaps you need to meet with your church group twice a month. Whatever tasks are required to reach your goals, write them down.
- What benefit is there to completing the task today? Don't put off until tomorrow what you can complete today. Some of the best advice I've ever received (and that I implement daily) is to do everything as soon as possible and to do the unpleasant tasks first. I battle procrastination daily. There was a time that I would put off returning a disgruntled phone call until the end of the day in the hopes the person had already left for the day. Once I learned to get the unpleasant stuff out of the way first, my stress levels and tension headaches went away. It still isn't easy dealing with unpleasantness, but it is a relief when it it is done an out of the way. What's holding you back? Is it procrastination, lack of time, lack of motivation? Write it down.
- How will completing this task help me reach my goals? Set up a "vacation fund" account and schedule automatic deposits of a pre-set amount into it every week. You'll be in Hawaii in no time. Schedule workouts by setting your alarm for an hour and a half earlier, set out your workout gear the night before and get a workout buddy who can either call to make sure you are up or who will workout with you. Get into the nitty gritty details. Most goals fail not because you plan to fail but because you fail to plan. Schedule, schedule, schedule, write it down.
Success depends on us moving past momentary feelings of depletion. Instead of rolling over, hitting the snooze and sleeping another 45 minutes you have to train yourself to move past the sleepiness/coldness/lack of motivation. How bad do you want to reach your goal? If you find yourself blowing off the tasks that help you meet your goals often...you may need to reassess your goals.
Change requires an uncomfortable identity shift. Change is often scary, irritating and sometimes painful. However, change can also be liberating, exciting and necessary. And, change almost always begins with getting off your "But".
Allison B. Kontur
www.BathBodySupply.com
